The woman in the river: How I met my new role models for life after 50

How to stay forever young? Swim in the wild!

One of my favorite places to visit is the beach at Big River in Mendocino County. Not just because its beautiful and full of wildlife, but because I always seem to find something a bit magical every time I walk its sandy shore.

Like one foggy morning when horses were trotting on the sand. Or another morning when I met the person I want to be in old age: A woman well into her 80s who swims in that water every chance she gets.

“You do this every day?” I asked her as she treaded water in that beautiful spot, made even more beautiful by the ripples of light in the waves she was creating.

She paused, likely deciding whether or not to even respond to this stranger interrupting her meditative exercise, then finally answered me with a simple: “Try to.”

That was cool.

Because I’ve thought about her ever since, this woman fully embracing life, not content to waste her last years letting her body decay in a recliner while watching television like another woman I knew on the edge of 80.

So the next time I was at Big River, I was drawn back down to the shore, hoping she might be there again. And though she wasn’t swimming in the river that day because it was wintertime and the water too cold, while searching for her again I found something even cooler: A whole group of women who swim there every day!

A member of the Big River Swim Team poses near the team's decal.

Members of the Big River Swim Team, they are a group of friends in their 50, 60s and 70s, who don wetsuits to brave the cold beauty of Big River for their daily swim.

“Why do you do this?” I asked them, though of course I knew why: exercise, companionship, accomplishment, and nature. All things that make you feel better, all things included in one  daily swim at Big River.

And of course those cool women knew the first swimmer I met, but told me she didn’t swim in the river past November.

“I want to be her,” I told Eileen, 64, who was drying off after swimming nearly two miles in the river.

“You can!” she said immediately.

That was super cool.

See more of Big River and its swimmers here:

Movies I saw in December: Anaconda, Fatman, Song Sung Blue

Why go to the theater anymore? Because it's fun!

My favorite movie I saw in December was also my favorite Christmas present this year, since it gifted me 90-plus minutes of hanging out with three of my favorite people: Jack Black, Paul Rudd, and a beloved family member.

Yes, the first two were technically only present on the movie screen, and yes, my companion and I didn't have to go to the theater to watch those actors together, but we did need a break from our menfolk. 

So I respectfully disagree with a recent column by Mick LaSalle, a film critic for the San Francisco Chronicle, in which he couldn't come up with a reason for anyone to see a movie at just a standard multiplex playing new releases anymore. Because we had two very good reasons to go to the movies that day: First, to escape our spouses and enjoy some belly laughs together, and second, to hear those laughs magnified by all the people around us. That was very cool.

The movies I saw in December were:

1. Anaconda (12/26/2025, in the theater) Grade: A

This movie was everything I wanted, an impressive feat given how excited I was after first seeing the trailer: Jack Black? Good! Paul Rudd? Good! Goofy reboot of Anaconda? Super good!

And unlike the disappointing sequel to The Accountant that also had me super excited after its trailer (more on The Accountant 2 here), this movie delivered, being both fun and relevant for people my age, with just enough silliness on top to entertain any kids (and grandkids!) we brought along.

2. Fatman (12/20/2025, Netflix) Grade: B

This movie was a slow burn, one best savored by super fans of Walton Goggins and Mel Gibson who are not expecting typical holiday fare, as this was a most a-typical Christmas movie with a most a-typical Santa.

And while I certainly appreciated every scene with Mr. Goggins, I could have enjoyed much more time with grumpy Gibson driving around in his Ford pick-up with a bottle of milk balancing on the dashboard and plate of cookies next to him on the seat, especially since an older Ford F-150 is just about my favorite vehicle to watch, either on screen or in real life.

3. Song Sung Blue (12/28/2025, in the theater) Grade: C-

It breaks my heart a little to give this movie a poor grade, because Hugh Jackman and Kate Hudson were delightful as low-rent lounge singers who find success as a Neil Diamond tribute band, and I could have happily watched many more scenes of them learning to harmonize, arguing over which song to start their concerts with, and how much time and effort they were going to spend getting his hair just right.

But much like the recent Bruce Springsteen biopic (more on “Deliver me from Nowhere” here), this movie spent way too much time off-stage wallowing in the sad parts of the story instead of giving the audience what it really wants: to sing some fun songs with some fun, good-looking people who also happen to be pretty good singers.

And much like Jackman’s Lightning refusing to start concerts with the fan favorite “Sweet Caroline,” it felt like this movie just didn’t want to give the audience what it wanted. Proven by my theater’s response to the credits, which was crickets: How could you possibly have more than two hours of Hugh Jackman, Kate Hudson and super-catchy Neil Diamond songs and not have people at least clapping afterward, let alone cheering?

I think most people, including me, would have enjoyed this movie much more if it left out many of the tragic twists and turns of the true story it was based on, letting its perfectly cast stars shine as the charismatic and talented real people they were portraying, while letting audiences seek out the rest of the story on the documentary that served as its source material.

I also wish Jackman had asked James Mangold, who directed him in "Logan," to take the helm, since Mangold proved twice, first in "Walk the Line" and next in "A Complete Unknown," that he can make meaningful-yet-enjoyable movies about imperfect musicians that neither skirt nor dwell on the bad bits.

Now, at last, the movies my grandmother saw in December of 1998:

Thursday, Dec. 3:

Ate KFC, pot pie.

To Show, “Bug’s Life.”

Home 4:30 p.m., worked on taxes.

Thursday, Dec. 10:

To McDonald’s for coffee.

Looked for pants at Penney’s, Gottschalks. Some Vanderbilts and Lees.

To show, “Home Fries.” Drew Barrymore, Luke Wilson? About “country” folks!

Friday, Dec. 18:

To post office, mailed 7 cards.

Longs, returned video.

To show, “Prince of Egypt.” Good.

Saturday, Dec. 19:

Coffee and donut on Ocean Avenue.

To show, “Gods and Monsters.” Ian McKellan, wonderful film.

Newspapers sold out in many places, found 3 left at Drug Emporium. 

Thursday, Dec. 24:

Justine here 3:30 p.m. Drove to see lights.

To show, “Gods and Monsters.” She had pizza.

Home 9:30. Some TV.

Tuesday, Dec. 29:

Wakened by quakes, 4:38. Back to sleep after moving lamps and gorilla.

To show after donut/coffee. “Shakespeare in Love.” Great.

Very cold. Vacuumed furnace. 

More of grandma's days in December of 1998 here.